Back to Basics: Dating Tips for Gay Men
As a man with plenty of dating experience, you might think that you don’t need any advice when it comes to courting a new guy. However, if you’ve had a string of failed relationships thanks to all of the complicated rules out there surrounding dating, then it might be time to get back to the basics with a few simple tips to take with you on your quest for love…
Be yourself. This mantra has been drilled into your mind since you were a kid, but it is definitely an age-old tip that always proves successful in life and in relationships. It is shocking the number of men who show off as an attempt to impress a guy early on in the relationship. Do not do this. Not only is it obvious, unattractive and exhausting, but don’t you want a man to get to know you for who you are? If he’s truly a genuine person with the right interests in mind, he will respect you for what you do and who you are. This is the number one most important tip to remember.
It’s all in the eyes. It’s easy to get caught up in good conversation with someone to whom you are attracted, but what we as men tend to forget is that conversation isn’t only about words. Much can be said with even just a glance…so this is why it is important to give your guy your undivided attention with strong eye contact. This will show him that you are engaged and truly interested in what he is all about.
Ask questions and LISTEN to the answers. Let’s face it. We as human beings love talking about ourselves. So when you are engaging in conversation, be sure to ask him lots of questions. This will be enjoyable for him and it will be reassuring that you are making the effort to really get to know him. Ask about what he likes to do and what interests him; all while remembering to get his opinion rather than just giving your own input.
No flowers on the first date. You may be a hopeless romantic who wants to sweep your guy off his feet the moment you pick him up for your first date, but hold off on this—for now. We all love getting flowers and as nice of a gesture as they are, on a first date a man might assume that you give flowers to all of your first dates. For your gift to be received as heart-felt, wait to bring him flowers until the third or fourth date and they are guaranteed to carry a meaning far exceeding their sweet aroma.
Keeping it low-key. Here is another dating tip for a single man that is often overlooked. You may want to wow another man on a first date with an over-the-top romantic evening, but it can be difficult to top that afterwards. For a first date, consider something casual like meeting up for coffee or a laid back dinner. This will take some of the first date pressure off and will allow you both to relax and really enjoy one another’s company.
Treat him as you would like to be treated. That’s right, the golden rule. Apply it to your dating life and you will take note of how much easier things seem to fall into place. Be sure that you show up on time. When you keep someone waiting on you, it doesn’t build anticipation but only paints a portrait of a man who is inconsiderate and self-centered. Don’t be that man. Be a man who not only is prompt, but who keeps his word. So when you say you are going to call…be courteous and actually call.
Honesty is the best policy. As with anything in life and especially your relationships, your best bet is to remain honest at all times. Be sure that you are truthful about what you are looking for, always keeping the lines of communication open. If you do not see a future with a man whom you have been dating, be upfront and tell him the truth so that you don’t waste any more time for either one of you.
Mark Weikel is certified counselor who specializes in improving relationships for gay couples and writes about such topics for Best Gay Dating Sites.